Month: April 2015

stupid magic (or maybe it’s just the whiskey)

I get on quite easy
living life as a spy,
I’m a stupid kinda person.
what kind of a stupid person am i?
I like train spotting and breeding guppies.
i want to be like all the yuppies
in this town who pass me by
and never say hi

but when i’m left alone
I like to contemplate night.
When the feeling is never right
I start to daydream
about nothing and
everything
that only matters much to a stupid person like me

My mind turns straight to whiskey.
i might just love it more than night?
i just might drink myself to get myself right
i just might drink myself more stupid and start a fight
i love falling over and getting dirty hands
i love to use words like magic and psycho
and say things like “no one understands”
but when i stop my talking
that’s a when i start my walking
down to get my fix
and fill myself easy
with a mix of cheap thrill
i’m a stupid kind of person out for the kill

-kyoko cole
2015
image

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your “love” is gonna drown

it’s been more than a few months now
since that night
and honestly i couldn’t say anything
to anyone
i couldn’t even mourn
without someone not understanding
why i would be mourning over someone like you
and at that moment
it was lonely
mourning over someone
who didn’t exist anymore
to go from one day
being in love
and the next
you being in love with someone else
there was no closure
you just ignored me
after a week
after i found out
you broke my shit
and i contacted you
you still just ignored me
and i was heartbroken
for months i spent mourning
and healing
without anyone else
to be my escape or my crutch
yupp. i just had to feel it
and it fucking hurt
and it fucking hurt for awhile
now i’ve healed
and i’m good with myself
and now i look back
and wonder why i ever allowed
someone as superficial as you
and as dishonest as you
to ever matter to me
i don’t fool myself anymore
i don’t pretend that something is something that it’s not
and i sure as hell don’t pretend to be someone i’m not
my whole life was great before you
and the people in my life made me happy
all that bullshit sweet loving shit you show in the beginning
i fell for
cause it was great
but knowing what i know now – i know that it’s only real while you feel it
and want to show it
and when you’re done
you could care less about the love all the bullshit you claim to be
you honestly were the worst person behind closed doors
and i’m sure you still are
since you never deal with anything on your own ever
anyways
i laugh now at it
and the people that still believe your bullshit
until who you really are- that selfish ugly careless person – gets bored and comes out again

Things we say

tumblr_l585sjOvQt1qanwnmo1_500Running around in circles
Just like the rat
Saying
“I don’t need this”
And
“I don’t need that”
caught in a loop
That’s Caught in a cage
Spinning Round like a hula hoop
With a great full of rage

What you get
And what you expect
Is way too much
For as much as you
let
Down

but it’s exactly what you need
And it’s exactly what you seed
Out to the world
And all the people you meet
What you get is what you need
Even if you think you don’t

Early morning 5am

Woke up early
Went to bed late
Saw a friend
Who made me smile
And for a little while
I held on
Only to be okay
With letting go.

image

-kc

Whatever it is

Make your way through it
Whatever it may be

image

Picture of me

Check out @missymiss’s Tweet: https://twitter.com/missymiss/status/581714446273224704?s=09