she was ice wild
cool
sharp
with the eyes of a child
images of a starry night
and the negatives of a hazy day
you can recall
the feel of it all
the buzz and fuzz
blurred out
in a dream like sorta way
take a drink
of her pink lemonade
blackness
and hide wide under her moon shine shade
get your fix on the mix
of hypnotic distractions
as you enjoy her soft parade
she was ice wild
cool and
sharp
but still just a child
-kc
When I fell in love with you
I had an open mind and an open heart
My smile was for you because you did things that made me happy.
You treated me nice and kind and we had fun
Over time you let insecurities take over
And became angry and mean.
You made me work so hard for your love you love gave me freely.
You took me for three kind of woman I was not.
I ended up paying for the sins of the women before me and I started to hate myself cause I didn’t know what I was doing wrong when I wasn’t doing anything wrong or bad to you.
I kept trying and changing and improving myself to be more understanding and considerate of your feelings only to have you be less understanding and considerate if mine.
What’s even worse is any time we would fight you would just ignore me like I never mattered. Yet the reason we would fight was because you didn’t want to hear my feelings if you didn’t understand them you would automatically just tune me out or call me stupid cause you didn’t want to deal with anything that I felt that ioi didn’t feel. You only wanted me to deal with your feelings when you felt them. Plus most of the time you’d be drinking something. Even if you didn’t drink for a few days – the long term use of alcohol made you become something else and that someone was very mean and abusive and paranoid.
I had beautiful feelings for you until you treated me the way you would treat someone who fucked you over which I never did. You made me become ( in your head) just the same as someone from your past until I finally lost it.
You wanted me to be the Whore you could blame for all your problems. You would rather see a lie that feels confortable and familiar than to see me for who i really was to you. Someone who loved you and cared enough to not want to hurt you.
It was never good enough. Out of all the things I did that were right and loving and good. You would hold onto this one tiny thing I said way back in the beginning that you didn’t like and use that as your reason to treat me the way you did in the end – completely awful.
I would cry myself too sleep so many nights only to wake up to the same thing and not want to leave my bed
I didn’t understand how i could love you so Unconditionally while you had a long list of conditions I had to obey before you even site m me even an ounce of affection. And even if I did everything you said you wanted it didn’t seem to marry you would still get drunk get angry and find some reason to point fingers and leave me again.
That’s what love is to you
That’s not love to me
If I wanted to be with someone else I would have been
I wouldn’t lie and cheat
Why would I have put so much effort until our relationship ( getting barely anything in return) if I didn’t love you.
Why would I constantly go to you and come a running every time you’d call if I just wanted to be with someone else?
That’s dumb that you even use that as a reason to be angry when I would always go home with you
You pushed me away.
You did this.
Not me.
I did everything I could to show you
Love
You did everything you could to push me away
And this last time
You hurt me worse than I ever thought imaginable.
For months after I was the depressed I’ve ever been and you didnt try even just to see if I was okay. I wasn’t.
I started to believe that everyone was like you
I was hopeless trying not to be hopeless
For months you just ignored me and I started to feel like I never existed or mattered to you.
It’s Funny how life is sometimes.
On my lowest night
I met someone
And didn’t think much of it at the time
But after the first night we hung out together I realized that is how it should feel. This is how I should be treated. This is how I want to treat people that are kind and caring and thoughtful to me.
It wasn’t me who did anything wrong with you yeag sure I made some minor mistakes but so did you (and many many major ones) and i didn’t just give up on you and stop loving you. I didn’t just start treating you like someone who didn’t matter the minute I didn’t like something. I communicated and I was honest.
I loved you
But you didn’t love me.
And now that I’m shown respect and love and care without all the unnecessary games abs run arounds and half truths but am still so many lies – i see it even more.
If you wanted me you would have had me. You would have treated me better like people do when they want to keep someone in their life.
You wouldn’t have let me go
But I’m kinda glad you did now
Cause now I know
What love really is. 
Tonight was awesome.
😉
And i can’t wait for it to happen again.
Slick
Slack
Flick
Flack
Sometime Soon
Under your paper moon
All you do
Will be thrown back
At you
And I’ll have a front row seat
To witness such a treat
And I’ll greet
you with a smile
And watch
As you drown yourself
In karmic debt
You’ll learn a feeling called regret
And feel what you made others feel
And you will hurt
and you will cry and
It will make your heart want to die
Cause you will know that it’s real.
And just as soon as the truth hits you
All the lights will go out
And you’ll come back in
And go straight back out
Through some body new
Yet you are still you
Will you change your ways this time around?
Or will you live another 50 years
Doing the same as before?
Once
Twice
Three times or more…
until the day you finally learn and change
You will never be free
-kyoko cole
It’s all fun and games
But you know the ugly truth
Is none of those people actually have your back
When the wolves attack
They are only about themselves and maybe that’s why you like hanging out with them
Cause you’re exactly the same way
They are wolves too
Needing a pack
To be somebody
To feel like they are somebody special
When they’re not
they ain’t nobody
Doing nothing
All the time.
Wasting space.
I can’t wait to watch
All of you
Drown yourselves.
Late night meeting
He comes
A groan withdraws
Within the pardon
I need a distraction
I need his diversion
Another night aborts around the twelve turnaround
Moving through the halo of numbers
Choking the hands of time
This outline destines the viable trigger
Will he shake the smallest moon?
Or shake a farewell
And make distances of my ugly past?
The trade views the spectrum
Before a crime emerges the music
I am almost back from the dead
HERE’S THE FACEBOOK FUNDRAISER PAGE FOR A.J. (MY LITTLE BROTHER)
IT EXPLAINS EVERYTHING ABOUT PERTHES DISEASE AND ALLOWS YOU TO MAKE A DONATION IF POSSIBLE
THE LINK IS LISTED BELOW .
https://www.facebook.com/donate/698193237276492/
To love someone
Who will never fully love you back
And to feel incomplete
Now
When I didn’t feel incomplete before
Meeting you.
My heart aches
And I’ll never be the same
First rule of being a customer at a bar: never ask your bartender if she/he knows where to get cocaine. First of all even if we did we wouldn’t tell you cause you very well could be a narc
Second rule: if you’re at a bar BUY A GOD DAMN DRINK. DON’T JUST GET WATER! IT’S ANNOYING!!!
Third rule: NEVER ARGUE WITH YOUR BARTENDER. HE OR SHE HAS THE AUTHORITY TO NOT SERVE YOU OR EVEN KICK YOU OUT.
Fourth rule : ALWAYS TIP YOUR BARTENDER!!! TRUST ME IT WILL BENEFIT YOU IN THE LONG RUN OR EVEN LATER ON THAT NIGHT. We tend to remember the people who tipped us the next time you want a drink.
That’s pretty much it for now Remember kids, DON’T BE AN ASSHOLE
i grabbed the moon
and the stars
started to scream
i almost broke the sky
Why moon why?
Everything I saw
was beautiful
It made me cry
