Why is it so hard for you
To see things from my point of view
If you only knew.
If you only knew
What i feel
How I feel
How you make me feel
Why can’t you see
How much I care and how much I try
And all the greif you put me through
Makes me wonder why
You look for reasons
That aren’t there
Why would you try to find the fault in someone you love
Why not build me up for the better
Instead of bashing me down
You want me to hate something in myself
That isn’t true.
I’ve tried so hard to just be good to you
And you just don’t give a fuck
Or about what you do
Maybe that’s the problem with you
You hurt my feelings
Cause you believe I’m some way I’m not.
Then you act as if I am and that isn’t fair.
It just pushes me away.
Maybe it’s all you know
Maybe it’s all you know how to do
But it really makes me feel bad about something that I’m not even doing and that I can’t control.
I can’t control what you think and feel
But if you could just be me for a day
You would know how I feel.
And you would understand me and see how much I love and care for you and i would never do something to hurt you just to hurt you.
Sometimes i just don’t feel like you want to see the best in me cause you’re too busy looking for the worst or the making things into the worst when they’re not.
I’m not perfect. I’m still learning too.
But you do hurt my feelings sometimes by treating me like that.
I deserve love just like everyone else does.
If the world is going to end anyways and I am going to end someday… Might as well make the best of right now.
I don’t like feeling of how quick you are to hurt me the minute you think I’m doing something that’s gonna hurt you. You react before you even know.
broken nose and a busted knee
i can’t walk and i can’t breathe
so no work
no money made
no going out
when will this shit
ever be done?
it never is
after you get through one thing
another thing takes it’s place
life is a never ending
i can’t face
i knew this day would come at last
i lived waiting for the end to come in fast
waiting for it
waiting for you
you handsome devil and the harm you can do
i knew better than get too close
i had little to nothing for you
but somewhere in between sheets and bodies turned upside down
turned hearts around
and waiting for the end
begins to start
soft sweet dangerous skin
didn’t even see you creep on in
in the back of my mind i know : I’m just another girl
one more notch on your belt
one more link on your chain
then jump on out with the next passing train
you kind ain’t my kind.
you charmed my ass blind
yes mister man… you are good. so very good at what you do
sweet talker fast walker
you get around
but it still didn’t stop me til then
i got lost looking for you
looking all around
it was then that i found
only an empty space
a fleeting face
not even a sound
in a silent forgotten room
with just the shadow of a friend
-only playing pretend
the makings of an end.
dancing in echoes
i dance alone
the only remains of you
the master of love ’em and leave
you are the king of make-believe
-kyoko cole 2008 link to the original post from my blog: the burning of the midnight lamp; the owl of minerva
You’re a dead man
Then so emotionless
You cause yourself a lot of stress
By the shit you say
Over and over again
but never do
You play the part
Like you got a clue
But then you act out
And show everyone you don’t
You don’t back that mouth up
You are too weak to change
No care to care about
Anyone or anything
Not even yourself
You only care to defend what makes you wrong
Same old story
Same old song
No one wants to hear your words
No one wants to see your face
While you chase
the ugly dragon
Waste your life
The same old circle
Again and again
Never getting anywhere
Up in the clouds
You’re a dead man
For a shitty you
And that’s the you
You have decided to choose
Matter over mind
Drugs over friends
I can’t trust anyone
Especially the ones who try so hard to make me believe I can.
Waiting to get fucked with
you got another thing coming.
I ain’t got no friend
This shit is about to end
IN SEARCH OF A REAL PERSON/ FRIEND
( WHO FOLLOWS THROUGH WITH HIS/HER WORD AND WHO GIVES A FUCK ABOUT COMMITMENTS AND FRIENDSHIP RESPECT MORE THAN JUST TEMPORARY BULLSHIT THAT DOESN’T MEAN ANYTHING TOMORROW ) SOMEONE WHO DOESN’T JUST TALK UP A BUNCH OF SHIT AND NOT BACK IT UP.
NO DRUG ADDICTS/ DEALERS UNLESS YOU HAVE A GOOD HEART AND ARE THE BEST OF THE BEST. NO STARVING DRUG DEALERS WHO ARE STURUGGLING TO DO THAT YET STILL WON’T GET A REAL JOB THAT ACTUALLY HELPS YOU
NO INSECURE PEOPLE WHO DON’T KNOW THEMSELVES BUT TALK A BIG GAME JUST TO DRAW ME IN AND MAKE THEMSELVES SOUND MORE IMPORTANT THAN THEY ARE.
ACCEPTING APPLICATIONS NOW
For the nice day
I had a great yoga class
Spent time with someone who means a lot to me.
Went to work
Saw some nice people
The weather was good
Stayed away from things that didn’t feel right to me
Got home safely
Got to spend time with my cats
for the most part
It was a pretty good day
And that’s something I am grateful for.
I know you’ll never love me as much as you loved her.
It’s lonely in here
When you’re mad at me
For believing shit that isn’t true
And it kills a piece of my heart
To know you don’t care to hear me
You don’t care to want to treat me nice
You don’t care to see the truth
Not what you think or believe
But what actually happened
I wish I was important enough
To have your trust and love and understanding
To not feel this loneliness and this bad
I don’t understand why I matter so little
When you matter to me
I try to be different and better than I have been
And it still seems like it just isn’t good enough
I’m not good enough