your “love” is gonna drown

it’s been more than a few months now
since that night
and honestly i couldn’t say anything
to anyone
i couldn’t even mourn
without someone not understanding
why i would be mourning over someone like you
and at that moment
it was lonely
mourning over someone
who didn’t exist anymore
to go from one day
being in love
and the next
you being in love with someone else
there was no closure
you just ignored me
after a week
after i found out
you broke my shit
and i contacted you
you still just ignored me
and i was heartbroken
for months i spent mourning
and healing
without anyone else
to be my escape or my crutch
yupp. i just had to feel it
and it fucking hurt
and it fucking hurt for awhile
now i’ve healed
and i’m good with myself
and now i look back
and wonder why i ever allowed
someone as superficial as you
and as dishonest as you
to ever matter to me
i don’t fool myself anymore
i don’t pretend that something is something that it’s not
and i sure as hell don’t pretend to be someone i’m not
my whole life was great before you
and the people in my life made me happy
all that bullshit sweet loving shit you show in the beginning
i fell for
cause it was great
but knowing what i know now – i know that it’s only real while you feel it
and want to show it
and when you’re done
you could care less about the love all the bullshit you claim to be
you honestly were the worst person behind closed doors
and i’m sure you still are
since you never deal with anything on your own ever
anyways
i laugh now at it
and the people that still believe your bullshit
until who you really are- that selfish ugly careless person – gets bored and comes out again

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2 comments

  1. You shall always come out up and above even better and stronger than before thanks to your vast art and faith

    Like

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