Beer as cold as your ex’s heart

I will never understand how some people can be so cold.

To turn off

To love conditionally

To have such black and white thinking and feeling

To be cruel

To make up reasons why to hate

To criticize and put down

Yet be blind to everything that’s good

To completely ignore their own behavior

To make another person feel unwanted

Unimportant

Useless

So many people “love” that way

That’s not love.

That’s just selfishness mixed with a bitterness

You teach others through love

You can kill a man with disregard and neglect

And a mean spirit

Some people’s truth is whatever they were conditioned with from the time they were born

All they know is to pass that down to anyone and everyone they touch.

Yet they don’t see it.

Some people love to blame others or something false as a reason to take out their anger and pain on someone

Some people only know how to push the people that care about them away.

If all you know is the negative

If all you’ve seen and experienced is negative

You’re gonna end up looking for the negative in everyone else that comes along

I wish compassion played a higher role in mankind

I wish people thought about the lasting effects of their actions and behavior towards others

I wish people didn’t react to things they make up in their head

We are in this world

Hopefully to help one another

Not to harm someone who truly loves you

And definitely not to harm the ones who love you just because our past experiences and trauma makes you think that it’s okay to do.

It’s sad.

But there will always be people out there who just don’t know why better

And /or just don’t care to be better than what was done to them.

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the master of make-believe

 

 

i knew this day would come at last

i lived waiting for the end to come in fast

waiting for it

waiting for you

you handsome devil and the harm you can do

i knew better than get too close

i had little to nothing for you

but somewhere in between sheets and bodies turned upside down

turned hearts around

and waiting for the end

begins to start

soft sweet dangerous skin

didn’t even see you creep on in

in the back of my mind i know : I’m just another girl

one more notch on your belt

one more link on your chain

then jump on out with the next passing train

you kind ain’t my kind.

you charmed my ass blind

yes mister man… you are good. so very good at what you do

sweet talker fast walker

you get around

but it still didn’t stop me til then

and when

i got lost looking for you

looking all around

it was then that i found

only an empty space

a fleeting face

not even a sound

in a silent forgotten room

with just the shadow of a friend

-only playing pretend

the makings of an end.

leaking hearts

dancing in echoes

i dance alone

the only remains of you

remains unknown

the master of love ’em and leave

you are the king of make-believe

 

-kyoko cole 2008  link to the original post from my blog: the burning of the midnight lamp; the owl of minerva

 

Color box

Don’t ever let the adult you

Grow up so much

That the child you

Dies

Break out the box of crayons

(if you still have ’em)

Buy a box

(if ya don’t)

Turn off your mind

And just color like you did

When you were a kid

Free from worry

Free from judgement

Free from rules or beliefs

Our adult selves hold onto

For whatever reason we do

Free From the weight of all the things that over complicate our lives and waste our time and energy

Free to feel the excitement from the simple things again

Do this

And you’ll start to remember

the joy and love and excitement

You felt

As a child

All from a box of colored wax

And a piece of paper.

Break something…

i’ve been stuck

in a rut

for too long

but i let myself

get there

and now i’m letting myself get

the fuck out out out

i wanna shout shoutSHOUT!!!!

damn all you manipulators

damn all you messengers of doubt

all your projection

i need protection

from you

your soul suck

and mind fuck

there’s noluv… in what you do

and i got no time left to waste on you.

Big head

My one wish

If I ever had a connection with anyone

Right now is the time to feel me

I can’t speak the words

I can’t move

I can’t go to you

I need you to feel me

And do something

Or not

Maybe that’s the way it needs to be

But if that’s the case

Then nothing means anything

And everything means nothing

And I’ll go to sleep alone

Just like I’ll die alone

And it all was a waste of time

Releasing Emotional Patterns with Essential Oils (2017 Edition): 2017 Edition

Narcissistic and Emotional Abuse: Shattering the Illusion

Life Skills: How to Do Almost Anything

the bed you made me sleep in

no love
no words
no care
no heart
no try
no thought
no time
no reply
no reason why
no hello
no goodbye

all i got was
your cold shoulder
your dead eyes
and your hate
directed indirectly at me

and there’s no reason
i deserve
your abuse
or your stupid excuse
for why it’s okay for you
to do the things that you do
i would hate to be you
you are blind
your deception of mind
was the abuse given to you
that you now give back to the world

Or at least to me

you don’t treat me good
you don’t treat love like you should
the good in you has died
And all you got now

Is evil inside

I don’t even try

Morning sun slips in

Through the blacks of My eyes

A second away from night

A moment away from sight

And many moons and days away from you

Feels like years now since we were we

I know you’ve moved on to worse things that make you feel better

At least for now

And I just move around in beds and in heads of others

To distract

I might seem okay to everyone else but it’s all just an act

A sad little act that maybe I’ll someday actually be

But the real me

Is a sad sight to see

inside I am empty

lonely

And lost

without you.

And there’s nothing I can do

Cause there’s no reason to

You gave me nothing

A million times left with no reply

Now nothing is all I got left

To give

So I don’t even try

In rooms alone it still makes me cry

I know the reason why

so i don’t even try

-kyoko cole 2018

Wednesday night

I Was feeling sad

Rejected

Unwanted

Then someone called my name

Then another person bought me flowers

But it still didn’t feel the same.

I’m grateful for this who cared

In a moment when someone did not

But I guess I just caught

Feelings

In a moment

For someone I should have thought twice about

Love is a Dog From Hell

Notes of a Dirty Old Man

“Charles Bukowski” Fine Art Quote Print, “She’s Mad But She’s Magic”, Literary Quote, Love Poem

Shiver noise

Under intelligent impulse

A stupid meeting

Takes place

The Bashful beast

Is Trapped in

A romantic ring

A false fight

Is the bait bubble

The Magic men

Regret the taste

Suspend a crush

In Down temper

The Flash of the Crash error

In a tramp trade

Empathy requires exploration

Peace is the driver of grace

We are stardust

We are golden

We grow

We vibrate

And then

We are reborn

Again

To be ignored

to be ignored

By the person you truly love

Is the worst feeling in the world.

shame
artwork by kyoko cole 2017

In between the moon and you

Everyone is happy

Happier without me.

I’m an illusion

Of what you want to see

At first you love me

Then I’m someone you hate

Don’t build me up

I’ll only let you down

I’m not someone great

Obviously….

I wish I was

I wish I had

I could wish my life away

Only to die

All alone someday

I see pictures of people

I used to know

They only come

To only go

Living lives

I wish I had

But it’s okay

It just makes me sad

Goodnight

Farewell

No more morning

For me

No mourning ever for you

To all the ones

Who I thought loved

But never knew