what a mess

you can be mad
misunderstand me
think that I’m bad
but I’m just here
alone and sad
if you could only see
what you meant to me

I need something good
to get me out of this funk
to show me that I could
have a good life
have a good day
remember why I’m here
help me find my way

cause being alone
is wrecking my mind
if you see me
please be kind

…. ugh

where no one can find me

Seven days 

Of solid sadness

Sinking slipping sinking deep 

Shooting guns

all a Blazin’

grazin’ skin

but I can’t sleep

I can only fade away

As the pieces creep on in

But where I am 

Who knows where
I end and
you begin

I do…
and I waited for you
but I can’t get you to

I don’t know where you are
I don’t know where you hide
I am all alone here
Got no one by my side

I don’t need to be yours
If you aren’t really here
I don’t need to feel safe
When I live with all my fears

I have no choice….

Seven deadly sins
But none as deadly as your cold
even the book of right and wrong
all those lessons have grown old

Like me

I don’t know where you are
I don’t know where you hide
I don’t need to be anybody’s baby
When there’s no one by my side

You can take off to the city
You can take off to the shore
You can take off with my soul
I don’t need it anymore

I don’t need it anymore

I don’t need me anymore

some day after this one
there will be no place left for you to hide
that is when you will finally understand me
with no one by your side

like me

many years too late
many years lost
we fight to be right
but at what cost

This world is not made for lovers
This world is not made for the kind
This world is out for blood
out to kill your soul and steal your mind

this is no fun

Better to be dead
than always on the run
it’s not living
when your time is done

Like me

cold weak end night

I can use up all my breath
vocal chords shot to shit
run circles around
your same old delusions
I’m losing it

I cry out
but it falls on deaf dumb ears
it’s all a joke to you
laugh it up
you laugh
as I die
you only cry
crocodile tears
you are cold and dead inside
I have wasted two long years
on what?
for what ?
of stress
you cause
you create
you don’t want to see
what you do
because if you did
it would kill you

who you are now
I don’t know
I do not know
I don’t want know
I just want you to go
and stay away

I’m just someone
for you to blame
it’s all a game
you love to play

make no mistake
you sealed our fate
you do not care
you do not care
you do not care
you have no care
and now it’s too late
you wasted all my effort
you wasted so many days
with your destructive ways
you destroyed my heart and all the love I gave
careless and cruel
the way you behave
now there’s nothing left to save
you lost my love
you broke my heart
all the damage you’ve done
I need a fresh start
now I see
I’m not the one
for you
and you will never be the one for me

I loved you
but now that love
is gone.

here are some books if you are struggling to get out of a toxic relationship or if you just got out of a toxic relationship and you need help recovering.

blah blah

a room
for days
on repeat
the same day plays
over and over
no fresh air
day after day
going nowhere

the less i live
the less I care

Listen to yourself

You know what you need

Listen to yourself

And feed

The starving parts of you

Before it’s too late

Left for dead

What a day

For wasting

Set your sights

Real low

Get stuck

And fuck


Fuck it all

To hell

Shout and yell

Inside a box

Inside a cube

All day and all night

Watching the tube

Let all life

Be sucked out of me

Get sucked out of you

This is no way to live

This isn’t the way to be

Don’t you see


Look in the mirror

That Pale and paste

Sans color face

Is me

Is you

Put down your phones

Go outside

Get some sun

Breathe in fresh air

And have some fun

Before we’re done

Say :

Farewell to the machine


Seriously join. They have some key cool stuff for cheap prices


you want the moon.
well convince the sky
from one moment
you create
wonderful things.
her sweet kiss
and softly brushed lips
between words and beautiful breath
you follow this feeling
under electric moonlight
shimmering out of darkness
And into pure light
you touch the soul and spirit of everything

he likes to fight
when his tongue is wet
from sucking the bottle
until the bottle is dry

if you ask him why

he blames me

he can’t see
how much damage he does
when he too drunk to think

but he will drag you along
insisting he’s right
and it’s you that is wrong
same old crap
same old song

and dance
he doesn’t deserve a chance
to be someone he will never be
he wants your love
so he can trash it
break you
then flee

his love isn’t love
he never really loved me
he doesn’t know how to love
or anything
all he knows is how to show affection
when there’s something he can take from you
that he needs

his talk is only talk
that mean
he gets off on
making others believe
as he deceives

the end

I am alone
with my head
and my heavy heart
and cold
why did you leave me this way?
why did you promise me you would always stay.
now I am left alone
with only these feelings
I get no response
no reply
from you
it’s like I’m not even here
like I’m invisible
not worth your time
and it hurts
it hurts so bad
to be ignored
and treated like
when I was once somebody to you.
what can I do?
not a thing
but to go away.
and stay away.
you pushed me so far away from you
so far gone is where I’ll stay.
this is the only way
I won’t have to feel
this pain.

the big fuck up

this silence
is deadly
your distance
makes me disappear
but I’m still here
even though I’m not much of a person
right now

I hurt you. I didn’t mean to.
but I think you wanted to go your own way
but I’m sorry that I said the things I did
I love you
but now you don’t love me
and it’s hard to feel
hard for me to see
hard for me to be
a person at all


I told you I would go away
and that day is now

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