Sleeping alone doesn’t feel right

But you are wrong this time

And if you loved me

You wouldn’t let me go

Not this way.

But I’m prepared to

….and that my dear is the last “poem” I’ll ever right about you.

sux ♾

Slip the tongue

Night is new

There’s a door

Right there

Come on

Sleepy time

Let me get you a blanket

I changed my mind

I think I needed this

I have to go

Drummer unknown

Thank you.

Oh no

This is a nightmare

I take you for a ride

In a garbage truck

You know you want to ride

Crash

What did I do?

What do I do?

Alright.

Krash

Does anyone need another drink?

I skimmed it

Is he a pirate?

Are you a pirate?

In the 7th grade

Kissy Kissy

Mystical powers

I know I’m slick

Maybe you’ll see

Defeat

That poor angel today

Hey

I’m too old for you

You are the salt of the earth

Whether they’re old new or new new

It’s all blue

On my mind

It was

It wasn’t

Let’s go get a beer

And that’s a wrap

tangerine dream

yellow walls
purple bed
I love to get lost
somewhere in your head

playin’ guitar
one red
one bluish-green
and you’re the best thing
that I’ve ever seen

make me happy
oh you already do
I love the nights
I get to spend with you.




Thank you

I miss the days when you wanted to go with me anywhere and everywhere.

It hurts that you don’t care anymore

Not like you did before

You make me feel like I’m nothing worth your time

And that’s what really hurts.

I guess everyone else is worth your time

And I’m just someone you can forget.

All the things I regret

I can’t make you feel something you don’t

And I won’t

Be chasing

Your ghost.

It kills my heart

And spirit

And I’ve already lost some of that

From loving someone who will never love me back

You just remind me of everything I lack

mommy dearest

let’s compare

People caring about good people only leads to good things

People not caring or giving a fuck about others has made this world what it is today

Fucked up and stupid

Entitled fucks who are too cool to be decent loving people to one another because it takes effort to be a good person and it’s a scary thing to allow oneself to be vulnerable and to change.

Treating people like they don’t matter

Doesn’t help anyone

Doesn’t make this world a better place.

Doesn’t bring living into life

Be heartless

And “above it”

And see where that gets you

All you’re doing is passing down the bad shit

That made people get this way to begin with.

It is all about love

Beyond this life and this place and this body and this universe.

Be the change

And come from a place where you can actually get through to others

With kindness

Not by acting like you’re better than everyone and know everything there is to know

You’re not willing to learn the one thing youve avoided your whole life

Yeah it’s uncomfortable

But it’s the uncomfortable things that make us grow

And maybe that’s exactly what you need -especially because you think you don’t

Thursday July 9 2020 12:25am

I wanted to feel loved

I wanted to matter enough to someone

I wanted to give love and trust that someone would give it back in times that were rough

But it’s hard for people to be kind

When they don’t like something

Or when something or someone makes them feel something they don’t want to feel.

People fail each other all the time

It just hurts me in a different way because I don’t give my true self to just anyone

And when I do

I’m trusting that they won’t reject or mistreat that part of me – that’s like a child

I’m grateful for the things I’ve been given

I just wanted you to understand me and be kind.

I didn’t want to feel like this again

Abandoned stupid and misunderstood

If you listen you will know what is needed

And if you don’t know

Then maybe you didn’t really want to listen

My feelings are valid

My efforts were true

Love is not shutting someone down or out when they are being difficult or too much

Love is feeling the other person. going inside their head and body and feeling through their heart and seeing things through their eyes and helping them feel safe.

Empathy

Too much to ask of one another

I guess so

I’m sorry

The things I tried to tell you

You did not care or want to know.

Everything led me to where i am now

Not a place I would want anyone else to be

Do you feel me?

Do you feel me?

Do you feel me now?

Will you only feel me

When I have gone?

Or maybe you’ll never feel me at all.

I’m sorry

Why?

Why do you fight me or reject me

When you know that I’m in pain

When you’ve been hurt by another person before

We were suppose to be on the same team

I was suppose to matter more than a trip to the bar

Just once

But it’s never

I’m always last

Or not at all

So that just sets it in stone

I don’t know why I’m here

If being here is only showing me

That I don’t belong

I’ve never had a home

And that I’m not even important enough

To love

When I need it the most

We all need love

And I give it

Even when it’s hard

Even right now

As I’m losing all hope

For myself

I am loving myself

Right now

To protect myself

From this ever happening again.

Waves

You want me to talk

Tell you how I feel

Until you don’t like what you hear

Then it’s all the same

Talk

Talk

Talking to myself

Only intensifies my pain

What if i ignored you

Treat you like you do

me

Can’t you even see?

No you get cold

And cold gets old

And old is this feeling

Of not being a part

Of always being in the dark

And I’m tired of needing something

From you

That you refuse to give

When it’s needed the most.

Stuck

I need a way out

Nothing you say or do

Makes me feel good

When I create something

When I express something

When I am

I feel no love

In the way

That I understand.

And I have to make room for

Your art

Everything you want to share

And I care

But you really don’t care

Much about me.

And what i need

Not about the money

It’s about feeling taken care of and thought about

And i don’t

I think of you

And will buy you anything

And usually offer

Or pay for it all

But you rarely do

You buy me dinner sometimes

And I’m grateful

But I don’t feel special

In a romantic way

It just feels bad

And whatever

I need to stop being so nice

Everyone is out for themselves

Which is how I need to be