Tag Archives: kyoko cole

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You stand there

Like a lost child

Like someone so out of place

Uncomfortable

unwanted

Uneven

You begin to see that YOU ARE THE JOKE

and it makes your lips tremble

As the lump in your throat

Begins to choke

The tears out

Of your eyes

I know it’s love

From his bed

I stare at him

His eyes closed and his face beautiful

It’s all so new

But I know that this is love

I won’t say the words to him yet

I won’t even say the words out loud

To myself

Because I’m enjoying the feel

Of this feeling I almost forgot was possible

But I know

This is love

Because of the way

He looks at me

The way he makes me feel

The way

I am and the way I want to be

It’s easy to love him

It’s easy to give him love

And I want to give him more

he appreciates it

He gives love back

He doesn’t make me feel bad or insecure

Like so many others do and have before

He makes me feel alive

I am born again

And all the hurt and pain of the past

Disappears when we touch

I know it’s love

Because I give him all I have

Without compromising myself

And I want to give him everything…

he gives

And expects nothing in return

He is kind and gentle

understanding and sweet

He makes me feel loved

And taken care of

Because he wants to

Oh the funny fuzzy fizzy feel

Excites every fiber of my being

In between kisses

And miles

And in between the sheets

He brings warmth

And laughter

And many smiles

I know it’s love

Even though it’s too new to say out loud

It’s love

Because he is

And I am

And we are

both

Together

Under the moonlight

In the sunshine

In the middle of all the crazy

Confusing World we live in

We are magic

like children are magic

Full of love and shining light

All over this very dark and lonely place

more alcohol please

weeded my garden
inside and out
organized my closet
got rid of half my clothes
i never wore
mopped all the hardwood floors
made some art
made some crafts
made a mess just to clean it up again
made my bed
and now….
i don’t know
people are weird
it’s not just the coronavirus that’s making this way
it’s our times
people are very selfish
and disconnected
we didn’t need this pandemic to social distance…
we do it regardless
we just don’t see it
cause we’re out and about
and being very social
being social doesn’t equal intimacy
just like sex doesn’t
it makes me a little sad
but it is what it is
and i’m happy to have dodge a bullet again
i’m not one to settle
don’t think i’ll start now

What are you?

make up your face
and your place
somewhere new and go

Fake up your grace
and fake up your case
and grow up
your old ego 
Slow

But it’s all for show

it’s the only way you can go
it’s the only way you know
it’s the only way you know

this place is full of spies
filled with people full of lies
too many
pretend
to be
your friend
just to sell
you out
while they
cash in
in the end
You just can’t win

Jerk Stain 

Wish I could erase

The trace

Of you 

And your stupid face 

I wish I could undo 

And replace

The space 

With someone new 

And  lovely. 

 Someone nothing like you 

If you could see yourself 

The way others do 

You would hate you too

My weak-end blues

Goes a little something like this :

Gonna wake up –

Just enough

To drink myself back to sleep

The bottle is my one true friend

I can’t keep

It together

I don’t know where to start

I got the blues

With a weak-end

And a broken heart

I got the blues

And it’s-a tearin’ me apart

-kyoko

Killing trees

Paper plates

And landscapes

Rain drops too

And morning dew

All of the things

that remind me of you

Won’t leave me alone

Won’t go away

But I can’t keep you

If you don’t want to stay

the dead and I

Won’t go our separate ways

But you do

it’s easy too

Nothing ever sticks to you

You just move along

Without a care

One day here

Next day there

Somewhere

(nowhere?)

Someplace else

With someone else

You’ll never know

How it feels

to watch you go

You’ll never know

How it feels

To feel this low

Hoping this time

will be

The last time

Somebody that I used to know

Quitters always believe the lies they tell themselves because delusion is easier to live with than the reality that they settled for an easier path.

-Shannon L. Alder

Evil loves to subvert all blame onto the innocent.

-E.A. Bucchianeri, Vocation of a Gadfly (Gadfly Saga, #2)

In the narcissist’s world being accepted or cared for (not to mention loved) is a foreign language. It is meaningless or even repellent. One might recite the most delicate haiku in Japanese and it would still remain utterly meaningless to a non-speaker of Japanese. This does not diminish the value of the haiku or of the Japanese language, needless to say. But it means nothing to the non-speaker.

Narcissists damage and hurt but they do so offhandedly and naturally, as an afterthought…

They are aware of what they are doing to others – but they do not care.

-Sam Vaknin, Malignant Self-Love: Narcissism Revisited

No other being is lesser human than the one who thinks of others as such.

-Abhijit Naskar, Human Making is Our Mission: A Treatise on Parenting (Humanism Series)

In the eyes of a Narcissist, they are perfect and never make mistakes. It’s always your fault.

-Tracy Malone

Once you are no longer a source of supply a narcissist will discard you cruelly with horrifically unimaginable devastation. This is when they show the ‘no empathy’ part. They do not care about you and learning that puts victims into a tailspin of confusion and depression.

-Tracy Malone

The emotionally cold or distant trait also rears its head during arguments when one person is experiencing and expressing significant emotion and the narcissistic person just checks out and does not respond—or does so in a cold and clipped manner. At such times you may find yourself spinning—and actually feeling as though you are “going crazy”—because the coldness of the response makes it even more difficult to regulate yourself in that moment. The emotional coldness can be confusing for you and may result in attempts to jump through hoops to generate warmth and connection with your partner. I have observed people wearing themselves out over decades, trying to create a fire where there was no possibility.

-Ramani Durvasula, Should I Stay or Should I Go?: Surviving a Relationship with a Narcissist

It might look like your enemies are winning, but be ready God is about to flip the script.

-Shannon L. Alder, The Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Bible

One of the easiest ways to discover if someone is compatible with you is to gauge their emotional intelligence. Are they a kind and sensitive person? Will they be respectful towards your sensitivities? Or, are they emotionally stunted? Remember, we tend to attract narcissistic types who lack empathy.

-Aletheia Luna, Awakened Empath: The Ultimate Guide to Emotional, Psychological and Spiritual Healing

A narcissist, on the other hand, is the exact opposite of an empath. Emotionally, narcissists are like brick walls who see and hear others but fail to understand or relate to them. As a result of their emotional shallowness, narcissists are essentially devoid of all empathy or compassion for other people. Lacking empathy, a narcissist is a very destructive and dangerous person to be around.

-Mateo Sol, Awakened Empath: The Ultimate Guide to Emotional, Psychological and Spiritual Healing

there’s no one who got away

Limited distractions

A force to reflect

All the things we normally forget

Looking back

I don’t look with the same heart or with the same head

mainly because

my love for you is dead

At the hands of you

At the hands of you

So you didn’t get away

No sir

Now With a better view

A clear realistic look at you

I wouldn’t want you to stay

I wouldn’t even consider it

Besides You never did much for me anyway.

It wasn’t me

It was you

That tried to make me pay

For your distorted view

How much better it would have been

If you cared and dared to really begin

If you didn’t allow all your past negative in

But you did

And it was there

You let your past negative win

Instead of us

You weren’t even aware

That it was you

Who

Took us down

Who would want that?

Not me

why would I ever

want someone like you around?

I don’t

Want you

At all

Anymore

I always knew

I was too good for you.

Now you will know it too

Twisted Gold Ring

I miss that time

Before all this shit

Went to shit

You gave me a ring

It was simple

Yet pretty

And it meant the world to me

But you pissed me off

And I threw it out the window of my car

ran it over

It had a kink in it after that

And I loved it even more than before

You gave it back to me and I wish I never gave it back to you after that

I miss that time and

I miss that little gold ring

Cause it came from your heart

Which just like you,

I never see anymore

And probably won’t see ever again

halt

Photo by Ilzy Sousa on Pexels.com

shadows kiss

this

soft parade down

town

i see you in the month

of gloom

doom

and prance my little dance

around your grave

all the things we cannot save…

the long goodbye

meets the short hello

the time we waste

is wasted below

the belt

and shine

waiting for

the finish line

the end

is not the way

to live

to love

or to spend your day

shake the trees

so the fallen leaves

die to the ground

open your ears

and listen

to the sound

as we miss

many a shadows kiss

has it come to this?

let’s go back to the start

and that begins within

the mind and inside the heart.

mind and heart

think and feel

dream and make

believe

imagine it and it will be

come

one with one

we are.

born again