Love

All I want to do

Is be close to you

I don’t want to waste any more time

Without you

When I know that you’re the one.

shoebox of years

photographs of people
some I can’t remember
some I would rather forget
some… I will forever miss
if I could do it all over again
I would
and I wouldn’t change a thing

not because it was perfect (it wasn’t)
not because I didn’t fuck up (I most definitely did)
but because all those things…
led me to you
and it’s you – I have been waiting my whole life for.

😉
_

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waiting out the days

Don’t want to scream and shout
but I can’t seem to figure it out
I feel like half a person
a big hole in soul
a big hole in my heart
when I reach out to you
you just tear me more apart

and I wish I was better
maybe better off dead
I let myself go through it
be in it
just to get you out of my head.

it’s so easy for you to be mean
hide behind your smoke screen
if you ever loved me
if you ever cared
I can’t tell
I’m not well
you love seeing me down
you love putting me through hell

and I wish I was happy
maybe I’d be better off dead
I have to get through this
be in this
just to shed you from my head

I know things will get easier
time heals
or so they say
but right now
I’m all kinds of broken
-just waiting out the days

until I’m okay again




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Above is a great journal to help you get through a breakup. Sometimes keeping a record of how you feel and what you’re going through day by day can help you better understand yourself and be more self-aware. It also can help you be aware of unhealthy patterns and habits.

blah blah

stuck
inside
a room
for days
on repeat
the same day plays
over and over
no fresh air
day after day
going nowhere

the less i live
the less I care

Listen to yourself

You know what you need

Listen to yourself

And feed

The starving parts of you

Before it’s too late

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Seriously join. They have some key cool stuff for cheap prices

We

I am here

And you are there

But we are connected

Many many lifetimes

Of knowing

And waiting

But do you want me

Or do you just want me to be safe?

You got your life

And I have to wait

But I don’t think you want to wait

Around for me

I know what I want

But I have things I have to do

And people I can’t let down

And you have others

You want and must have around

I want a family

I want to truly be loved

seen

Felt

And understood

If you could feel my heart

You would know

But you only show

What you show

And I really don’t know

Where I fit into that

Maybe I’m dumb

Or blind

Or half blind

But I do know my heart feels something

Strong

For you

What do you want from me?

What do you have with others

What do we do?

It can’t only come from Me

Clearly

Speak

What is inside you

may your dreams be better than this

in a blink of an eye-
lash out
and about
face-
time-keeps on
ticking
TICKING
ticking
into
the futureless
loop
of hands that
wave high
and scoop low

and everything we think we know
has been wrong
as the grand finale
begins
this marks our end
this is our swan song

oh sing me a tune
one soft and sweet
a song where I
and the dreamworld meet
one that soothes me to slumber

and one that will promise to keep
me safe
from
the fall
of it all
and what is about to come.

-kyoko cole

photo by Kyoko Cole © 2017




once again

late night walk –
around the block
or two
or ten
in my head
thinking brain
monkey brain
feeling lame
feeling lost
feeling
too much feeling
gotta get out
of this
of it
and I know
that someday I will
but still
until
the day I do
I’m here on this walk
with the talk talk talk
back and forth
like ping pong
right and wrong
repeat song
inside my head
from me to me
and I to I
going through and through
the suck
stuck
fuck
of thoughts
and feels
journey through the
rat race
space inside my face
a trip of fools
or this trip of fool
singular
me

into the trees

lovers
you look empty
the love
might just change like lies

the changes catch
unborn truth
the voices speak just like you
the trace of silence
was real
with this feeling
from the last moment
without knowing
all you need
the lonely
-after hour anxiety
some little bugs eat
you ask one question
and hide before it can get to you


child distract him
absolutely invisible
there were cries
waiting for the night
the scent collects
but here this idea comes
and you need sleep and affection
so here it gets lost
the only fatality
made forgetting more melancholy
not sudden and nothing happened
this sinking evil illusion
life disappears
the voice here
never existed
this false face
tears softly and challenges
the real


all eyes had felt
your denial
this useless existence
away with the night

you who come from the dark-
unusual
into this light-
strange
your love
was enough
above the sky
you can see
that this is the end
whispering time
hear the word
hear our language
a sudden
taste of
mystic too
many must look
not dwell
under the fall
without the curtain
glow like you

purple would have understood
the holding hand
the mouth both interested and obsessed
for you
the black was still light
this face and soul the same
everything around you
faded and
remained


slippery
love
shake you out
out
out
this was absolutely different
your heart vibrations smile
flames from the body
will not be tamed
they are beautiful
lovely but cursed
as you
find them new meaning
I’ll remind you
of my kisses
and continue life mute

-kyoko cole

night sights and sounds

dark fever growl
you scream and howl
wild by night
I lose sight.
Where did you go?
something I may never know
or most likely I already do

I sit and watch
sleepless nights
fall over me.

I wish I had the feel
I feel too much
I don’t feel at all
I wonder which one
is real.

-Kyoko Cole

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