words

Is anyone out there like me?

b-side junkie1 Comment

It may be

That I don’t want to see

All the things I see

And maybe I don’t want to be

This person who is me

Who am I anyway?

Am I just what others say?

Or maybe just yesterday I meant something

To you

But not today

Today we’re through

maybe I don’t want to feel

Everything I thought was real

Perhaps you feel quite alright

With throwing me away tonight

With doing things that hurt me more

With all of me you choose to ignore

And maybe I don’t want to stay

Maybe I don’t want to play

This stupid game

this stupid me

Maybe I just want to be

Free

From living

This stupid life

Maybe I don’t want the strife

It hurts my heart

To have to defend

What most of you can’t comprehend

Or Maybe I just can’t

And don’t want to pretend

Maybe I just want the end

-kyoko cole

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6 am feels

b-side junkieLeave a comment

Broken window screen

The kind of blinds I hate

But the cool cold 6 am air

Comes in

Makes my skin tingle

Makes my flesh jump

Excites the parts of my body that

Excite my everything

Makes me want to feel

Again

www.skinlovesfever.com

What can I do?

b-side junkieLeave a comment

Nothing
Even though the unhealthy partv if me wants to try
I see no reason to.

Someday never comesĀ 

b-side junkieLeave a comment

Busted pieces

Faulty parts

Dead eyes

Cold hearts

There’s no use in trying

To save what’s sunk

There’s no use in holding

On to what’s junk

The city of stars

Is under a starless sky

The city of sunshine

Is where light comes to die

It’s a fraud

It’s a fake

It’s the kind of city that will make

And break

You into the worst

But first

It will take

You

And

It will blind you

With the illusion

And then fill you up with confusion

Until you

are no longer you anymore

Love means nothing Here

It’s just a word people throw around and use

and abuse.

There’s no use in trying

There is no use in trying

-Kyoko Cole 2017

A fight I can’t winĀ 

b-side junkieLeave a comment

I used to try 

But now I see 

That it ain’t me 

That’s the problem  

And you can believe 

Whatever you make up in your head 

But I see 

What’s actually reality 

And you just don’t. 

Everything you do is like toxic glue 

It’s easy to stick to you 

I thought you loved me too

But now I see that you don’t love me at all 

Emotional abuser 

Manipulator user 

Narcissistic paranoid accuser 

A liar 

A blamer

A child 

A shamer

Just a loser 

Who’s gonna  lose in the end 

Cause you can’t grow 

If you think you know 

It all  

But clearly you know nothing 

But a bunch of bullshit 

You’ve Brainwashed yourself to believe 

Where is your heart?

You have no heart 

No love

No care 

You’re a little angry man 

Unaware 

Of what really matters 

Unable to ever change 

Amateurs (don’t take things or this so seriously)

b-side junkie6 Comments

Thirteen ways

To kill your loverĀ 

A hundred and one ways to dieĀ 

It paysĀ 

To beĀ 

Cemented in your ways

Or does is pay to beĀ 

Wild in the streets

Like a wild cardĀ 

Jump up jump aroundĀ 
New York girls

Are too hip

As they hop

To the topĀ 

of the Empire state buildingĀ 

Which I don’t care to ever climbĀ 

A Hot house
As ColdĀ 

As your unbearable heart

Finish what you start, you say

As everything slowly starts to shiftĀ 

Deterioration, they said

Right before it was deadĀ 

It was everything that ever was

That is not a thing any moreĀ 

That couple over thereĀ 

Kindly lent their owner

To the dogsĀ 

Frequencies areĀ 
Less frequently

Felt in the airĀ 

The less we care

The more weĀ 

Dread

The dead

That’s a coming

Round the bendĀ 

So buckle up partnerĀ 

It’s coming to the endĀ 

The perfect partner

Of An imperfect pairĀ 

Doesn’t dareĀ 

Taunt

The electronic wizardĀ 

OrĀ 

The human lizard

But will hauntĀ 

The Spirit hunter

And the Catholic priestĀ 

Who will soon sit down Ā 

For the mighty feastĀ 

And break some breadĀ 

And both get fed Ā 

The last supperĀ 

Is a coming soonĀ 

Blasted allegories
Blast past noonĀ 

You are Not there

In the making

the making that never wasĀ 

Was never there within you

Ā Ā Take me to the riverĀ 

Drown me in the water

Let it cover me upĀ 

And Let my body sink lowĀ 

The more you say

The less you knowĀ 

MisleadingĀ 

Misreadings

Draw on you now

Like the raise of an armĀ 

And the hand that signals the alarmĀ 

To wake upĀ 

Wake upĀ 

WAKE THE FUCK UP

Before it’s too late Ā 

wait it already is …

-kyoko cole 2017

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a.d.w.a.y – (something i wrote exactly 4 years ago tonight)

b-side junkie2 Comments

a.d. w. a. y. ?

August 4, 2011 at 4:24am

you would write a thing or two and

toss it a million ways around

the net-

-work

it’s way aross the many screens

i didn’t think twice

when it would

sometimes hit me

sometimes miss me.

but now i find myself missing you

you were lonely then

like me now

searching for something

that only exists with some people

and even some people have exhausted it

but you were sensitive like me

i could feel that between the static

i could feel that between the lies

the lies of life

we see

and run into

and

all i can think about right now

is the empty

and the space

the negative

the silent

on the memory of something

notifiations never-

tag my name now

no notes

no news

not

nothing

new

comes now

from you

you’re nowhere to be seen

please

come

back

my friend

you don’t know how much you mean

…

to me šŸ™‚

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poisoned brain

b-side junkieLeave a comment

don’t want to try
to do anything different
than what hasn’t worked
a whole life time
but it’s never you

or it always you
but that’s just what you’ve expect for yourself
even though you are more than that
sometimes

but sometimes isn’t enough i guess

when you don’t see it

and when you don’t care

how can anyone else?

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Not your ex

b-side junkie1 Comment

Treat me like I am
But I’m not.
Treat me like I am
I don’t care.
And I won’t
So
I.dont
And you
Can
Do whatever you like
Say whatever you will.
Fill whatever you fill
Love somebody else
And I will do the same.
You don’t want to play this game
But you do
With
Everyone else
And I
Don’t care
As long as you are happy
I’m happy you are happy

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stupid magic (or maybe it’s just the whiskey)

b-side junkie3 Comments

I get on quite easy
living life as a spy,
I’m a stupid kinda person.
what kind of a stupid person am i?
I like train spotting and breeding guppies.
i want to be like all the yuppies
in this town who pass me by
and never say hi

but when i’m left alone
I like to contemplate night.
When the feeling is never right
I start to daydream
about nothing and
everything
that only matters much to a stupid person like me

My mind turns straight to whiskey.
i might just love it more than night?
i just might drink myself to get myself right
i just might drink myself more stupid and start a fight
i love falling over and getting dirty hands
i love to use words like magic and psycho
and say things like “no one understands”
but when i stop my talking
that’s a when i start my walking
down to get my fix
and fill myself easy
with a mix of cheap thrill
i’m a stupid kind of person out for the kill

-kyoko cole
2015
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the ghost of my friends

b-side junkieLeave a comment

This is not a prison.

This is a trap.

I am the bait.

___________________________________________________________

Having balls is a good thing
having raw passion is a good thing and a rare thing.
To have both passion AND balls is what makes someone great.
I miss the great ones

I miss the lovers
and the dreamers/creators
I miss the artists
I miss the tortured souls- the poets…the journeymen …
and I mean the real ones
the real risk takers
the real love makers
the ones that do what they were born to do
unafraid of being who they really are
the ones that live for what they love
and the ones that love to love.
it has nothing to do with image
and everything to do with heart and soul
and pure being
I miss the truth in them
I miss their passion
I miss having them around
I miss them knocking at my bedroom window at 3am
driven by desire
driven by love
and…That feeling –
that wonderful feeling of hope and wonder
and the excitement in life and love
I miss the fire

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-kyoko cole Ā 2008