You want to leave me
and i can’t argue
i can’t give you anything
that will make you feel
like you should stay
if you’ve already made you way
Out the door
like I’ve seen
many times before
you ever existed in my life
all i can do is cry
as the greatest part of me
continues to die
the end is near
i say words
that have no sound
that you will never hear
the fear
of losing
again
wins.
Tag: relationships
Love
All I want to do
Is be close to you
I don’t want to waste any more time
Without you
When I know that you’re the one.
2 pianos and a cat
I sit here and look at a room filled with stuff
memories collecting dust
2 pianos covered with this and that
and on the couch asleep
is my siamese cat
I don’t know what to do
I don’t know what to say
when fear sets in
and gets in the way
frightened child
inside the 40 year old me
why must I always have to be
number 1
the best
the first
the only
given 100%
have all
or want nothing
I don’t know…
I sit here
and wait for my feelings to go
down a bit
level out
but I know
if I do
then I’ll do without
so I sit
in silence
Let myself feel
Letting go
Is the way to heal
waiting out the days
Don’t want to scream and shout
but I can’t seem to figure it out
I feel like half a person
a big hole in soul
a big hole in my heart
when I reach out to you
you just tear me more apart
and I wish I was better
maybe better off dead
I let myself go through it
be in it
just to get you out of my head.
it’s so easy for you to be mean
hide behind your smoke screen
if you ever loved me
if you ever cared
I can’t tell
I’m not well
you love seeing me down
you love putting me through hell
and I wish I was happy
maybe I’d be better off dead
I have to get through this
be in this
just to shed you from my head
I know things will get easier
time heals
or so they say
but right now
I’m all kinds of broken
-just waiting out the days
until I’m okay again
Above is a great journal to help you get through a breakup. Sometimes keeping a record of how you feel and what you’re going through day by day can help you better understand yourself and be more self-aware. It also can help you be aware of unhealthy patterns and habits.
what a mess
you can be mad
misunderstand me
think that I’m bad
but I’m just here
alone and sad
if you could only see
what you meant to me
I need something good
to get me out of this funk
to show me that I could
have a good life
have a good day
remember why I’m here
help me find my way
cause being alone
is wrecking my mind
if you see me
please be kind
…. ugh
where no one can find me
Seven days
Of solid sadness
Sinking slipping sinking deep
Shooting guns
all a Blazin’
grazin’ skin
but I can’t sleep
I can only fade away
As the pieces creep on in
But where I am
Who knows where
I end and
you begin
I do…
and I waited for you
but I can’t get you to
I don’t know where you are
I don’t know where you hide
I am all alone here
Got no one by my side
I don’t need to be yours
If you aren’t really here
I don’t need to feel safe
When I live with all my fears
I have no choice….
Seven deadly sins
But none as deadly as your cold
even the book of right and wrong
all those lessons have grown old
Like me
I don’t know where you are
I don’t know where you hide
I don’t need to be anybody’s baby
When there’s no one by my side
You can take off to the city
You can take off to the shore
You can take off with my soul
I don’t need it anymore
I don’t need it anymore
I don’t need me anymore
some day after this one
there will be no place left for you to hide
that is when you will finally understand me
with no one by your side
like me
many years too late
many years lost
we fight to be right
but at what cost
This world is not made for lovers
This world is not made for the kind
This world is out for blood
out to kill your soul and steal your mind
this is no fun
Better to be dead
than always on the run
it’s not living
when your time is done
Like me
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space
heart space
room space
head space
my space
shared with a
head case
nowhere to go
no place
to move
I can’t breathe
I can’t face
it anymore
I try…
to make it better
I try
to make it okay-
to make it
just o.k.-
only to
have it not be
okay
only to have it
stay…
Just the same
or get even worse.
like a curse
I need to reverse
but I can’t
seem to –
get myself back
on track
when I have no space
to move
No space to breathe
no space to live
please just give
me a break
for god’s sake
at least be helpful
not harmful
be aware
and care
instead of just
always there
– always in my way.
please…
make it be better than just okay.
because every day
living this way-
is not living
it’s death-
at least tomorrow
*sigh*
is a new day
to try again.
-k.c.
Disclosure: Some of the links below are affiliate links. This means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn an affiliate commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.
the end
I am alone
with my head
and my heavy heart
silent
and cold
why did you leave me this way?
why did you promise me you would always stay.
now I am left alone
with only these feelings
I get no response
no reply
from you
it’s like I’m not even here
like I’m invisible
not worth your time
and it hurts
it hurts so bad
to be ignored
and treated like
nothing.
nobody
when I was once somebody to you.
what can I do?
not a thing
but to go away.
and stay away.
you pushed me so far away from you
so far gone is where I’ll stay.
this is the only way
I won’t have to feel
this pain.
miserableboy42
time for the tables to turn
it’s time for me to ignore
all that is you
cause all you seem to do
is find a reason
to make me wrong
so you can do what you do
and i’m not going to swallow that
shit you call love
when it’s all just abuse
i really loved you
and this is what you do
to me
who just wanted to be good to you
but even that
isn’t good enough for you
you look for any reason
to turn
what was true
into a lie
so you can do
whatever you want to do
you’d rather be right being wrong
the same ol’ story
your same old fucking song
it never mattered
how much or little
i give to you
the idea you have made up
in your wet drunken
sunken head
has killed my love
has left me mostly dead
instead of trust
you push and you push
until you bust
any good
that we had
some people love their misery
some people like being sad
and mad
and drunk
and sunk
and that someone is you
out to sea
this is you
but this ain’t me
your drowning
drowning in your own
sorrow
fucked up
and checked out
in your make believe
ugly world
that ain’t mine
this isn’t the time
to go down
to the hell
you call home
right fighter (serial killer)
murderer
sickness
I am sick
but you are cancer
you think you have the answer
to everything
which you do not know
even though
you know me better than most
here’s a toast
to you
and your ability to kill
at will
and still
think you’re right
even when you’ve lost sight
blind as a bat
scaredy cat
with your proverbiale claws out
but worse
cause you curse
everyone you love
in your “passive aggressive
fucked up
fuck you ”
kind of way
that ain’t kind at all
do you get off on watching others
that you think are guilty- fall?
and let me pose another question
for you
that i know you’ll never answer
cause you’re too busy building up your stupid wall
is there a slight chance
just maybe
quite possibly…
you could be wrong at all?
ha
NEVER! NOT YOU!
stand by your convictions
fight to be right
just to be right
can’t even acknowledge left
or that you could be wrong
same old story
same old UGLY SAD PATHETIC song
spread your ill
and kill
the ones who ever loved you
OFF
SO YOU CAN SAY
IN YOUR FUCKED UP HEAD
“at least i’m right”
skin loves fever 
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