kyoko – Page 20 – skin loves fever

if i only could make a deal with god

Sometimes stupid
Maybe less
Maybe more
Than you
Or you
Or any of you’s
who is
out there
Who’s
To say???
You got it made???
— Got it all worked out???
UP there stuck
in your head ok?
But then someday
you find that it’s not
What you FIRST thought
Only then you find yourself to stand
Where I stand now
and It’s then some how
you’re change of place
changes the view you face
And your sight you see
To understand me
What I tried to show
From my side now
You did not want to know

And I will go
On
And I will be
Somewhere Beyond the ocean
Somewhere Beyond the sea
Somewhere Beside
someone who
Is right there beside me
but over there now
Patiently waiting for me

For I know in my heart
That amazing things begin to start
As the old fades and falls apart
and greatness comes in …if you allow it to

Adams for peace

“If you’re frightened of dyin and you’re holding on…Youll see devils tearing your life away.But…if youve made your peace,Then the devila are really angelsFreeing you from the earth…..from the earth….from the earth”

Tonight’s show was beautiful
But it made me realize
This whole thing isn’t for me.
I don’t belong here

don’t think twice it’s all right

i want things
now
that maybe is too much
too soon
too different than what you want
maybe not what you want at all
and tonight
i can feel it
let go
i’m not super sad
i’m not super happy
disappointment comes in like the morning sun
harsh and bright
but a dose of reality is something i need
to keep me from getting too lost
in something that doesn’t welcome it
or want to get lost in me
i’m content
in letting it let go
and i have to be okay
with what is
and what is not
what comes and
and what leaves
it’s never really goodbye
but it is
a step back
and step away
a step out
and a step in the right direction
towards something that needs me just as much as i need it
whatever it is
i never doubted you
just so you know
but maybe i doubted
things within myself
much greater than just being great all the time
but i never doubted you at all
or what i felt about you
we just want different things
and that’s okay
i will find my way

we accept the love with think we deserve

put it down –

stop the cycle spin
out
of
control
– i can end this right now
by ending any future pass
down of shit
that my crazy breeds
everyone in my family just keeps it going
like they have to pass on
something fucked just to make them feel less fucked
but i see that
maybe there is no way out
for me but
to do this world and the people a favor
and just kill it
so it doesn’t spread into
any more hearts
my heart is sick
put me out of my misery
and be done…

i’m happy
with the idea
of leaving it all
when it gets like this
and i feel like this
and i’m alone
i’m happy with being alone
and gone

i love a lot of things in the world
there’s so much beauty
but i am not one of those things
and every time my efforts and love
don’t seem to do much
but abandon me
at the worst times

when i need love more

i just see that
this world
was not meant for
someone like me

put it down for good…
good night
until the next time
we meet again

-k

coagulation

on my tongue driven
dead leaves fall on blood stained face
streets full of rain
tiny fractures
stained table cloth fingers
standing still

she hears each of his lies
she listens for his breathing
hark, the call of birds
his false shadow, painted skin
a child cries

coagulation

she stands on the edge of space

waiting/ ready to evaporate

the dead and green leaves clutter

the bubble cloud of air and water
mixed

continues for love

long lost dreams gone whispers fade
spiders spin webs lost highway
in our hearts trouble

drunken thoughts today
complicated on stained sheets

in his eyes her eyes
glowing moon
witness the lack now in bloom
thick in fog of heaven and hell
specks of love gather in a stream

life scratched from rust
each is made of dust

lost in silence
whispers fade

whatever gets me through the night

I write this from a bar
Waiting
For an old “friend”
To meet me
Darkness surrounds
Encompasses
Fills
Expands
Around and in
Me
That’s the beauty
Of
Dark places
You can hide
And find
Others
That are
So transparent
That they
Hide too

As for me
I don’t want to hide
Forever
It’s the dark and light
It’s the night and day
It’s the two sides of the fold
That make life
Worth living
And worth giving a shit about
And that
Makes me love
All of it
So
Very
Much
More.

🙂

Your kind of lovin’ drives a man insane So look for me a walkin’ just any ol’ way Have love, whoa Babe will travel Have love, yea Baby will travel If you need lovin’ Then yeah, yeah, Ill travel

Tonight

I wanted it
More
Than
Anything
Else
Continue reading “Tonight”

just a thought

over thinking
seems to be
a defense mechanism
a way to avoid
my own feelings
or truth

sometimes we live in our heads
to avoid what we feel in our heart
cause what we feel in our heart might be too real
and it scares the shit out of us.

i like things that scare the shit out of me.
it reminds me that i’m still alive

there are night…

there are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.

George Carlin

playground love

love right nowyesterday is gone
and tomorrow doesn’t exist
right now is all we actually have

Tell me what i’m supposed to do,
With all these left over feelings of love;
‘Cause i like to fall into
the i don’t know
when i do
i can feel you
And tell me love how i’m supposed to feel,
When all this magic becomes too real;
cause i tend to go
to the i don’t know
when i do
i know exactly what i feel for you
And I know that you see the places inside me that I find in you,
And with you i know how to separate the old hurt from the heart;
i don’t care if we move too fast
cause i want to jump inwhile the feeling is alive
tomorrow can’t be promised
and yesterday is already gone
so right now is all that matters
and right now
all i want
is to be with you

my new buddy down the street

repulsive epic episodes
murky borderland adorns
with rust collecting dust
flailing catacombs
we are dying undead
and dead over and over again and again

longingly crying in craving
rigidly darkly, gaily and grey
mint squirms, doleful last
we are the gone not going anywhere
mirrors go nowhere
mirrors the nowhere fast
in the middle of the
these
is an apology
for the me
myself can’t
even look
in the eye
it feels like my time is growing old and almost out

Don’t extract , tongue
throat, control,
Must restructure now.
must refrain
compose
decompose
composite
composition
decomposition
reposition
com
de
re
un
dis
ex
pre
in
mis
non
anti
sub

-ist
ies
-ism
ish

The soft black out swimming;
It is the dying spirit alive within me
Desiring the no’s I hide naked
and fold into the shake
falling into finding you

write fade
flutter
flicker
flash of shudder
stut..ter
stammer
state
shout
spit
spat
splat
with electric shock
to zap out the line of flat
with your electric feel
ringing the new of you to me
comes in an electric buzz
in fizzy dizzy
rings around our heat of electric fuzz

tongues love tasting the ooze
pouring what comes of me and you
a hazy crazy night of hearts in spin
dripping drooling all over and under
electric bodies and naked skin
between you and me

that this
that this is
between us two
is something
and is nothing
at the same
and very different time
and it is or isn’t
only
in that moment
that is is or is not
whatever it is or isn’t
is exactly that right now

and that (whatever it is or isn’t) is beautiful
i live
i love
the moments that make up my life