there’s no other way
and no other day
to say
goodbye
all the things
i would, would not
and could never say
but now i need to go away
i really did try
day after day
just to get by
some things are for letting go
some things we must learn to let die
you would write a thing or two and
toss it a million ways around
the net-
-work
it’s way aross the many screens
i didn’t think twice
when it would
sometimes hit me
sometimes miss me.
but now i find myself missing you
you were lonely then
like me now
searching for something
that only exists with some people
and even some people have exhausted it
but you were sensitive like me
i could feel that between the static
i could feel that between the lies
the lies of life
we see
and run into
and
all i can think about right now
is the empty
and the space
the negative
the silent
on the memory of something
notifiations never-
tag my name now
no notes
no news
not
nothing
new
comes now
from you
you’re nowhere to be seen
please
come
back
my friend
you don’t know how much you mean
…
to me 🙂
don’t want to try
to do anything different
than what hasn’t worked
a whole life time
but it’s never you
or it always you
but that’s just what you’ve expect for yourself
even though you are more than that
sometimes
but sometimes isn’t enough i guess
when you don’t see it
and when you don’t care
how can anyone else?
I might have let it get to me
What I feel
What I see
What is what
What is not
I don’t know
What is real
i don’t know
much of what is
other than
what i feel
And what’s really to be
What you
do
and
do not
show
And what all is
left over
Rinsed out
the residue
Really has got a hold of me
For the time being
for now
but
Not forever
The hazy
Dazy
Lazy
crazy
Glue
of me
But nothing
ever sticks to you
All that is
or isn’t
ever true
with you
You can quickly cut
You can easily undo
as i struggle to make my way through
…
it all..
From a reaction
without any
satisfaction
What it is
what isn’t
and what it never was
and what it will never be
as anger grows
and confusion shows
only breeds
more negativity
and nothing more
out of  nothing less
with less and less humility
Tear down everything
Instead of build  up
now lost
as
we lose
No trying
to understand
No one
to hold my hand
lack of care
Lack of love
i ask for a miracle
or something more
from up above
i don’t know the name
it all starts to become the same
as everything before
until there is no more
we all lose ourselves out there somewhere
but where are you …???
and where am i???
20 years have gone by too soon
come back down
to this place
underneath the timeless moon
Treat me like I am
But I’m not.
Treat me like I am
I don’t care.
And I won’t
So
I.dont
And you
Can
Do whatever you like
Say whatever you will.
Fill whatever you fill
Love somebody else
And I will do the same.
You don’t want to play this game
But you do
With
Everyone else
And I
Don’t care
As long as you are happy
I’m happy you are happy
.
My only regret
is that I did not forget
You sooner
Than this
And…
the only thing I truly miss
Was my idea of you
But not really you at all
I will not
have you
Act like you did nothing
But be clear
About something
That was never clear
I will not
Have you
Matter to me
More than I matter to you
I will look at this
And see it for what it is
And look at you and see you for how you are
And i will remember this
And not ever be confused in thinking that your actions before were what they OBVIOUSLY are not now
Maybe someday you might see things from my side
But I don’t need to be close
To something that is so far away
To someone who closes me off
I don’t need to be anything or anyone
That means nothing
To you
Running around in circles
Just like the rat
Saying
“I don’t need this”
And
“I don’t need that”
caught in a loop
That’s Caught in a cage
Spinning Round like a hula hoop
With a great full of rage
What you get
And what you expect
Is way too much
For as much as you
let
Down
but it’s exactly what you need
And it’s exactly what you seed
Out to the world
And all the people you meet
What you get is what you need
Even if you think you don’t
finding the way through fears. finding myself and the freedom that comes from knowing thy self.
i used to write
my heart out
without any doubt
without any fright
but somewhere along the heartache and years
there seems to be a build up of unsound fears
that accumulate
in a frantic state
inside an emotional ride
takes me to the other side
automatic
erratic
sick and unfit
the only way out
is to move through it
be silent and still
and in the right state of mind
i find
myself
and know myself
better than to let
any thing or anyone
get
me down –
the truth is those things don’t matter to me
i matter to me
knowing myself is what sets me free
-k.c.
i know
sometimes it’s me
but i like you
and you’re worth it
i gotta let it in
(let you in)
and let it go
(let fear go)
and give up
the fight or flight
shit i do
that is never right
and never good
and never works out for me
this time
i want it
to be different
and as good as it can be
goodnight
this song reminds me of someone stupid
“Charmless Man” by blur
I met him in a crowded room
Where people go to drink away their gloom
He sat me down and so began
The story of a charmless man
Educated the expensive way
He knows his claret from a beaujolais
I think he’d like to have been Ronnie Kray
But then nature didn’t make him that way
He thinks his educated airs those family shares
Will protect him, that you will respect him
He moves in circles of friends who just pretend that they like him
He does the same to them and when you put it all together
There’s the model of a charmless man
He knows the swingers and their cavalry
Says he can get in anywhere for free
I began to go a little cross eyed
And from this charmless man I just had to hide
He talks at speed he gets nose bleeds
He doesn’t see his days are tumbling down upon him
Yet he tries so hard to please he’s just so keen for you to listen
But no-one is listening and when you put it all together
There’s the model of a charmless man
He thinks his educated airs, those family shares
Will protect him, that you will respect him
Yet he tries so hard to please he’s just so keen for you to listen
But no-one is listening and when you put it all together
There’s the model of a charmless man
One- on- one mixed-media art lessons in Los Angeles
‘Cause talking is better than working
I spend a lot of time pondering what it all means.
A Writer's Musings (And Likely Some Shameless Self-Promotion As Well)
An outlet for my random thoughts and interests
where would it flow...
Serving a little poetic nourishment Monday thru Friday and featuring a Short Play Saturday Matinee to read.
Tales From The Life Of A Soul
skin loves fever 
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